December 2011
New Year’s Resolution:
Replace heart with arc reactor.
Well it appears to be critical analysis of the...
It’s been pretty sweet.
It’s a productive day, today.
I’ve shaved, had a shower and a coffee, released my shorts from the custody of Parcelforce and bought a Voltron t-shirt.
I’ve only been up for about half an hour.
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After a long and arduous battle with the Parcelforce website, my stuff will be delivered on thursday.
For the sins of the drinker, the morning must pay.
I can't fit them both in my mouth!
Alex Howes’ new catchphrase
If you’re not living your dream right now, it’s because I’m doing it for you.
Cheeky KFC to be swiftly followed by getting my drink on.
I always open double doors at the same time and then walk off grinning.
Trained in the art of devastating the arts.
Seriously though it feels like I’ve been stabbed.
I’ve pulled a muscle in my stomach or something and now it hurts when I walk.
It’s just one of those mornings where I’m all too aware that I have the next two days off.
I love it when bands are so metal that you can’t even read their names.
“Why am I standing here doing this when I have you?!”
– My boss, on the important nature of my work
Breakfast is for the weak. So is lunch. And dressing appropriately in the winter.
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For want of a better word, I think my keyboard is fucked.
larrybtime:
At one point, it was considered a genuine privilege and a joy to be able to use, learn and love the written word, to be part of the literate world. Doesn’t it feel, now, that we must be going backwards somewhat when it becomes apparent that, by and large, “lol” is used and believed to be an actual word.
I have like 5 BBM contacts now and I only know one of them and it’s really sad.
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Sometimes, I tell females how much I weigh and they get really upset.
Fishing tea bags out of nigh-on boiling water with crayons.
Fuck cutlery.
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Violently battling the temptation to eat an entire yule log.
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My insides hurt.
Is this what it’s like to be ill?
Please don’t let me be ill.
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Why won’t people realise that Top Gear sucks?
HAVE AT THEE. →
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false-heroes:
I’ve thought of three ways in which I could rationalise paying for Marshall’s burrito and mojito today.
I owe him money after I lost a dubious bet.
It’s my Christmas present to him.
Marshall and I are not actually friends, actually he is a rent boy and I have to pay for his company.